“Penny – I feel your pain. I too have had a multitude of disappointments that stem from my mother’s lack of empathy, love or kindness. There is a term for this kind of parental hurt and destruction. I was made aware of it about a year ago – it rocked my world to say the least. I learned my entire childhood was a joke, I was raised by a woman who never wanted me. I am reading a book now called “Children of the Self Absorbed”by Nina Brown. It has opened my eyes beyond words to the abuse, verbal and emotional that I too experienced. The actual term is parental destructive narcissism. They cannot see it, they will never change it, and nothing can be done about it. Some of the best things to do are sever ties with that person. I am still miles from being “recovered” from the pain I endured, but the craziest part of all of it – no one ever thought this was a possibility. The DNP’s biggest weapon is their mouth and usually in private. I am still working through the details and trying to recognize all the symptoms, but this book is quite encouraging for you, the adult child, who is still reeling from the effects of this parent. Here’s an article with a brief snip it from her book. http://www.wmeades.com/id211.htm”